The Space of Manifestation

There are moments when all the things you are doing begin to converge and suddenly, there is light where there was none before. Or perhaps is was always there and it is only my sight that has been cleared, my eyes that have been opened.

  Rameen Peyrow of the Yoga Loft, beloved mentor and friend lead me to another point of convergence with his yoga talk the other night. It continues the question of "Why are you here?" with a bit of a twist for 2012. The concepts I bring to you are his, embedded within the context of what I am learning and beginning to understand.

  2012 has a lot of significance for all of us on this path. It is "the quickening", the shifting of all awareness, the beginning of our true understanding of manifestation and what that will mean to the human race.

   He sits before us on this beautiful evening and I find myself contemplating his face. For me he is happiness, peace and grace. He waits until we are quiet and he begins.  Something is happening, the subtle sensation we feel in relationship to why we are here. We are all noticing that sensation. What is it? What is manifesting from that space is everything you are in this moment. Pure pristine potential. We are the dreamer dreaming the dream. We are the main character in a story that we create in each moment. We are the each the author and creator of our own reality. Everyone else are secondary characters in our story, and we are secondary characters in theirs. It all starts from that inside space, that component within us that allows enough grounding to draw in the state that we wish to have. There is nothing random. There is intelligence connected to it. To know and understand that energy is to no longer be in the dark. In my own journey, I have learned that there is profound purpose to that darkness. It is necessary so that you can be reborn into a higher level of self. He reminds us that Chaos is the great cleanser, the clearer of states. Every exhale is like a clearing. If you do a little every day, there is never much to do.

   My mind lingered in this place, for one of the great lessons I am learning is that we are in constant fluid motion. We must dismantle to create. We must break ground to build. My journey to yoga was this. To live, we must be willing to move, physically, mentally and spiritually. We must remind ourselves to soften, relax and release,( Rameen's personal mantra ), to open our hands and our space.  Everything we need is already within us. Our asanas in yoga simply support us by teaching us to stack bone on bone, joint on joint in order to make it possible for this state of mind to occur. It lifts us to a sensation of vibration, rather than a state of being physical and dense. We align body, mind and spirit with the energy of manifestation and we flow. The ground must be tilled and made ready. We may wish for something to manifest, but often we have not prepared for that. We must become impeccable in our listening skills, not only with our ears, but with all five senses and beyond. All must speak to the energy that is manifesting our own reality because in order for us to direct it, we must first form an intimate relationship with it. The energy itself is neutral, it is what we bring to it, that makes it dance.

    To remind us, he touched a statue of Shiva. The Ananda Tandava- the dance of destruction and creation. It is at once a blissful joyous dance and a fierce one.  Shiva's face is in a neutral position. He is balanced. The flames around him represent the idea of an ongoing expression of this burning we feel.  We must be brave, Shiva's left hand is in flame, destruction. To remind us this is not new. Our challenges and struggles are not new.  There is a lot of creative energy behind the solutions. A lot of emphasis is place on his foot in the air. It surrounds the idea of liberation, he is free.  His other foot stands on a demon, once the awareness is there, we shine bright. What is unknown, becomes known. The snake is Kundalini energy. Body, breath and mind. The drum he holds in his right hand is the rhythm of life itself. Soften, listen and feel.  He suggested thinking of lifetimes, or exhalations. Each time we exhale, we die. Each time we inhale, we are reborn.  Aphana and prana. Shiva's expression of eternity. The energy of shiva is designed to break apart the universes you have created out of ignorence.  In your concious state of mind, you are always awake and manifesting. It exists always, right in front of you. You become part of the experience and it is no longer random.

    In yoga we are asked to distill our intention to one word. One word that holds all we wish to become.  We are reminded to hold this in the space of manifestation while we practice. To see it behind our eyes, to bring sensation to it, life to it.  To bring your intention into reality it needs constant attention. You must be impeccable with your tilling, the preparation of your soil. What you wish to manifest is like a seed. Bringing your attention to it is like sunshine. Anything you are truly focused on is with you in every moment of every day. At first it is challenging because you have not developed intimacy with that relationship. Rest into that manifesting energy that is creating your reality. Bring awareness to how you can fill it with your breath, and feel how it is expressed throughout the tissues in your body. It is the energy of creation.

    When we are centered in that place, that space from which we conciously create all of our reality, that manifestation space, we are unaffected by the external. The external is only a distraction from that place where we become incredibly connected, incredibly close. Moving through discomfort becomes something that simply has to be done, so no problem.  We can relax back into the space that is emerging and soften, relax and release.

    Rameen ended by explaining that the space in front of your face is everything. The now. This is the mantra, Ohm. You are conciously connecting to the manifesting energy that is creating your reality. Our breath holds a particular rhythm based on our thoughts and energy. He made the statement " breath overrides thought". Our thoughts should always be for us, not against us. They are our thoughts! How does it support us, since we create, them to do otherwise? Unhappy experiences are there when we are not doing what we are supposed to do. When we come from that internal space, we are elated even to go through difficulty. If you haven't found that, the time is now. There must be a fearlessness that surfaces, for what is fear, but belief that you are separate from the divine. You must be willing to take that step. To build what you wish, you must first break ground. You can break a thought, destroy it with your breath and start all over again. Our thoughts are no use. We must get to know the fibre of what is creating our reality, our story and attempt to stay with that in every moment. Be the energy, and see what happens.

     I have just finished reading a book by Don Miguel Ruez that beautifully converges on Rameen's wisdom. The toltec believe that we are are doing exactly what he spoke about. We are dreamers dreaming a dream, completely unaware that we create our own story.  It is time to awaken and manifest from that beautiful space. Thank you for your wisdom and the gifts you share with each of us. Namaste.

   I will close with a beautiful exercise that Rameen left us with on the eve of this new year to bring us conciously into relationship with this space. Speak them out loud to that space of manifestation.

Inhale : I am breathing into my body           Exhale: I soften, relax and release
Inhale:  I breathe into my mind                    Exhale: I soften, relax and release my thoughts and emotions
Inhale:  I breathe into my intention               Exhale: I am grounded in my intention
Inhale: I am breathing into the intellingence Exhale: I am living the intelligence of my intention
of my intention 
I am ____________ ( my intention), I am living _______________(my intention)
Inhale: I am the intelligence of my intention  Exhale: I am acting on the intelligence of my intention

May 2012 bring us all enlightenment.
In love and light,
Kathryn

Bringers of Light

Each of us holds within our center a flame. A brilliant, blinding source of love and light, that often we cover up and hide from the world as a result of our hurts and scars as we move through life. They are points of divinity within us here on earth, points of reference to guide us through this life.

    When I meditate I can feel that flame growing inside me to the point where I sometimes feel heat coming our of my chest and my hands. I am starting to feel like that light is finding its way to the surface of my skin. To become visible to those who are also seeking to see.

    I left yoga the other day in the afternoon and a homeless man on the street came up behind me asking for change, I felt terrible. I had nothing with me. The friend I was with gave him all the change he had and then the man walked away. My friend turned to go to his car and from behind someone gently but firmly came up and wrapped his arms around me, gave me a squeeze and gently let me go. It had such warmth to it that I actually thought it was someone that I knew. I never thought to be afraid. I was surprised and as I turned to see who it was he looked over his shoulder it was the homeless man, and he smiled at me with a mouth full of broken teeth as he made his way down the street away from me. I felt strangely blessed, like I had been touched by an angel. I turned to see if my friend had witnessed what had happened but he was nowhere in sight.  I was profoundly affected by this moment in time.

    Last night I spent the night helping a friend move furniture, and then we met another friend for coffee and dessert at a little out of the way cafe. I have been very conflicted about seeing this friend because I started doing yoga at her studio and ended up training somewhere else because I couldn't make the times work. I feel like I have been "unfaithful" to her and it was eating me inside. I have thought a thousand times of how I could tell her so that there wasn't this block in my energy with her. During the conversation I took a deep breath and I said " I need to share something with you." I told her how conflicted I was feeling and how desperate I was for her to understand how much I value her. How important this journey has been to me and how grateful I was for her guidance. She is very spiritual, and very self aware. She shared with me her own in the moment honesty and her feelings of jealously around that. And you know what, I sat and let those feelings land for me.  But in the end she thanked me for sharing my truth and told me that it was the journey that was important, and the relationship we have is sacred and precious. I felt tears in my eyes at the clean-ness I felt between us in that moment. A brightening of my internal flame. I felt grateful I found the courage to be true to myself, and to her, in that moment.

     There was an italian man working in the shop who had been flirting with us all night. He was funny and engaging and clearly enjoying the brightness of the energy that surrounded our table as we laughed and giggled the night away in intense conversation. He came and sat with us at one point and then just before we left, he came over with three little white bags each with a beautiful pastry inside. He thanked us for the evening and hugged us, sending us each out with a little treat and begging us to return soon. He was gallant and chivalrous and reminded me that small acts have profound meaning in the lives of others. I left feeling beautiful and precious with that small white bag between my hands and I said a small prayer of thanks on his threshold, for sharing the flame inside him, that divine point of light, with the three of us.

     May you see in this beautiful season, your own flame, reflected in the faces of strangers and loved ones as we all make our way home.

I send you blessings of love and light,
for my own cup overflows,
Kathryn

The Magic Kitchen

   I am reading a facinating book called "The Mastery of Love" by Don Miguel Ruez.
It speaks a lot about the concept of what we all believe love is. What exactly it is we are looking for.

   Most of us go into relationships like people starving. We are full of unfullfilled needs.  We are looking for someone else to fill in the blanks. To fill us up. Now imagine that you have in the center of your house a magic kitchen. In that kitchen you can always make the most amazing delicious food. You can out do any restaurant and any chef's creation you have ever tried. You will never again want for any taste sensation. It is all at your fingertips. And in fact it always has been.

   The doorbell rings. Some person is standing at the door with a pizza. They look at you, and you look at them and they say " I can bring you pizza every day, if you let me into your life and let me control you. You will never go hungry again." I can tell you that with that magic kitchen behind me, I would laugh, say " no thank you, I have a magic kitchen where I can make my own pizza, in fact probably better pizza" and send them away. If you are starving, you will invite them in and start the process of hoping they will show up everyday. The process of worry and doubt, what if they don't show up? How will I survive?
 
     I had a conversation with a friend a few weekends ago about an age old truism about relationships. There is always a lover, and a loved. There is always a slight imbalance and sometimes a large one. The power shifts in one direction or the other, and it is almost always about need. The one with greater need is the one who is the lover. The one with less need is the loved. In this way, we are always in the doorway waiting for that pizza guy to show up. What if we knew we could make it equal? Right now?

   Guess what? Your heart is the magic kitchen. You already have a source for all of the love that you need in your life. It is open 24 hours, and it can create as much love as you need at any time. It is an inexhaustible resource. And what no one seems to understand, is that the moment you go into relationship with another human being expecting to have them serve you pizza, you have given them control over your happiness and that cannot help but end in disaster. No one can be responsible for your happiness. It is not their job. The moment we try to take responsibility for someone else's life or happiness we have just told them we do not respect them enough to believe that they are capable of creating their own story.

    And that is all that life is. A dream dreamed by a dreamer about a dream. Central character ? You. Everyone else are secondary characters. Them you cannot change, not if you understand this process. If you don't like the dream change it from the inside. Doing that changes everything else. Not taking responsibility for other people's journey frees us up to actually choose to be truly in relationship to one another. To serve one another without needing each other to fill up perceived voids in our lives that we need to be filling from the inside. To operate from a position of abundance and freedom is to experience happiness in it's purest form. Self made happiness, an endless  supply!

    Your magic kitchen is open for business. Start filling yourself up instead of looking to others to do it for you and watch your life transform. When we operate from a position of abundance, when we are full, we can be fully present for the people we love in our lives and they can do the same for us.

Happy cooking!

   In love and light,
Kathryn