The Month of Fasting

  I believe that things come to us unbidden and in guises that we would never expect. I believe that in every experience there is a gift or lesson. Sometimes many more than we expect.

 

  Today I begin the month long fast that has become a part of my life over the past three years. Part of the endless rhythm that ebbs and flows within me.

"Why are you still doing this? " I have been asked.

Why do we do anything in life?

  Because for me it was never done for anyone but myself. Each time I did it was a personal exercise. A spiritual journey that I walked alone. Fasting has many interesting elements for me. I had never fasted prior to three years ago. I am a girl who likes her meals. At first I did it because it was significant to me to honor something that I believed in. As I learned more about it, it began to engage my heart and mind as well as my stomach. It became an exercise of accountability. Of sheer will. There are moments where I want to cheat so badly I can hardly stand it. No one would know but me. But therein lies the point. I would know. Isn't that all of life? Aren't there endless opportuties to lie and cheat and do things we know aren't right? Who is watching, do you think? Or, do you think? Life is about each moment that we choose to be accountable to whatever we hold as divine AND ourselves. This is one of the ways I have chosen  to be more aware and more accountable in my life.

  My dreams come more clearly and my meditations are powerful.  I drop like a rock into the space I normally struggle to reach. It makes me think, you know, century old practices have forgotten value. For as we have forgotten the mechanics of how to reach into the depth of our souls, so too did the practice if preparing the body for those journeys become unimportant. Fasting for me is the preparation of my spirit and my body to receive the blessings of life.

  The first three days of the fast are the most difficult as your body burns off it's glycogen stores. Then it gets easier.  I get up according to the times set for fajr ( which is the last minute you can put food or drink in your mouth for the day). Today that was 3:52am. Tonight I can break my fast again at 9:30pm. And then each day the morning time moves ahead a few minutes and the evening time the same. The fasting time gets shorter ending the last day with 4:56 and 8:30.

   For me it has become the time of year for spiritual, mental and physical cleansing. I drink more water at night, eat healthier, avoid pop and aspartame. You know. The things I have trouble avoiding the rest of the year. I am more concious of my thought patterns. I spend less time distracting myself, and more time listening. I am gentler with myself and others.

   The month of fasting from a spiritual perspective is divided into three distinct times. The first ten days are devoted to contemplation of mercy. The second ten days are devoted to forgiveness, and the last ten days which are supposed to be the most powerful because your body has been mostly purified are about redemtion. Three concepts which are very healing and necessary to the human race.

    The last thing I do at the end of my fast is make a donation to one of the foodbanks or related charities that feed Edmonton's poor and homeless. When I realized that if you miss a day of fasting the release was to feed the homeless, my first thought was "maybe I should just intentionally screw up some days and do both!LOL!! " My compromise was that I would stay true to my fast and instead offer up what I could to help those in need as a gift to myself for successfully completeing my fast.

Instead of a trial, it has become a time of year that I truly look forward to.

In love and light,

Kathryn